Psalm 68 January 18, 2008

So, after I wrote the last post, these verses from Psalm 68 came to mind.

5 A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows,
is God in his holy dwelling.

6 God sets the lonely in families,
he leads forth the prisoners with singing;
but the rebellious live in a sun-scorched land.

7 When you went out before your people, O God,
when you marched through the wasteland,
Selah

8 the earth shook,
the heavens poured down rain,
before God, the One of Sinai,
before God, the God of Israel.

9 You gave abundant showers, O God;
you refreshed your weary inheritance.

Out of My Box January 14, 2008

I’ve heard people use the expression, “think outside the box” so much that I don’t even like that expression anymore. As I’ve thought about my experiences last week in Honduras, that phrase has been coming to mind. I’ve mentioned in other posts how I like things in life–whether it’s people or ideas–to fit in neatly ordered categories. That’s the librarian side of me, I suppose. As I’ve looked back over the last year and thought about the last week of last year, that seems to be what God has been saying to me: Get outside of your box.

I saw this idea play out in multiple ways in Honduras. One of these way during the New Year’s Eve service we attended at Astrid’s church. The service was in Spanish, but we were fortunate to have transmitters that allowed us to hear a translations in English. The pastor’s sermon was on 1 Corinthians 9:24. He encouraged all of us to keep running the race for Jesus. Church was a different experience in Honduras. It was very Spirit-filled. People were praising God like their lives depended on it. It didn’t strike me how different praise and worship was until I went to church back home last Sunday and attended chapel at work this week. I love my church and our worship, and I also love chapel services at work. I want to praise God like my life depends on it because it does.

One of the more moving parts of the service for me was at the end when the pastor had people move to stand together with their families. We were sitting with Astrid and the girls from the Hope House. These amazing ladies are all Christians and are trying to change their lives. They live at the Hope House for a couple years while they go to school or receive vocational training. The goal of Orphan Helpers is that these young women (and men at the Faith House) will eventually become Orphan Helpers themselves. Who better to share the gospel with orphaned and incarcerated children than those who have been there themselves.

When the pastor asked us to stand with our families, these girls stood with us and Astrid and Miriam, the house mom at the Hope House. As I stood there I thought about my idea about family. I began this year disappointed that my best friend had moved away from Tennessee and that I was coming up on my 32nd birthday still single with no family and children of my own. I’ve tended to measure my success as a human being on whether or not I have a husband and children. I felt like a pretty big failure at that earlier this year.

Over the course of this year though, God has opened my eyes to see how fortunate I am to have such a great family, just maybe not in the way I have traditionally thought of family. I have amazing parents who would do anything in the world for me and love me unconditionally. I have friends who support me and care for me by listening to me (even friends who go on mission trips because they don’t want me to be disappointed that more people aren’t going). I have a church family who encourages and affirms me in God’s calling in my life. I have co-workers who for some crazy reason follow me in my leadership at work. I have students who I get to pour my life into on a daily basis. And, for the last four years I have had the privilege of getting to know some great children and sharing God’s love with them through the ministry of Orphan Helpers. It may not be a family as I have traditionally thought of a family, but it is a family nevertheless.

And while I hope someday to have a family all my own, I realized standing there in that service that God has graciously given me many people in my life who love and care for me and for whom I also get to love and nurture. My only hope is that through Christ and his love, that I can be faithful to love those for whom I am called to care for.

So while the year began with some disappointments, God allowed me to end the year with a grateful heart for all that He has given me and a desire to keep looking for ways to love others.

Song for Today January 13, 2008

These song lyrics caught my attention today as I was listening to my iPod.  To hear a bit for yourself, go to http://www.igracemusic.com/sandrahymns/.  The whole album by Sandra McCracken is worth a listen.

Jesus, the Lord, My Savior

1. Jesus, the Lord, my Savior is,
My Shepherd, and my God;
My light, my strength, my joy, my bliss;
And I His grace record.

2. Whate’er I need in Jesus dwells,
And there it dwells for me;
’Tis Christ my earthen vessel fills
With treasures rich and free.

Chorus: Mercy and truth and righteousness,
And peace, most richly meet
In Jesus Christ, the King of grace,
In Whom I stand complete.

3. As through the wilderness I roam,
His mercies I’ll proclaim;
And when I safely reach my home,
I’ll still adore His name.

4. “Worthy the Lamb,” shall be my song,
“For He for me was slain;”
And me with all the heavenly throng
Shall join, and say, “Amen.”

Back to Work January 8, 2008

Today was my first day back at work after two weeks. I can’t remember the last time that I had that much time off from work at one time. Coming off of the trip and immediately back into the fray of a new semester has been its own kind of culture shock.

Over the last couple days everyone has been asking me how the trip went. The typical response of “great” or “good” just doesn’t seem adequate. I’ve found it difficult to quantify. At work we are going through our annual reaccreditation, so everyone is scurrying to make sure that we’re assessing our programs and evaluating what we’re doing. All the talk is about assessment and quantification is important, but difficult to do at times.

As I’ve begun to talk about the trip, I’ve found it difficult to assess or quantify just exactly what we accomplished. We didn’t go and build a house or set up a library or paint a room. We spent a week hanging out with kids and teenagers sharing stories, hugs, and laughter. And along the way, we shared the Hope of our lives, Jesus Christ. I’m positive that our team was changed by this experience and hopefully the kids and girls we met at the Hope House were changed for eternal, Kingdom purposes as well. However, that kind of change is difficult to measure in numbers or adjectives.

So, one immediate response that I have had to this most recent trip is to ask how do we measure success in short term missions? What is a successful trip and how do we know when we have one? Is it a warm, fuzzy feeling? An emotional high? Something tangible that we can see we have done? The number of conversions? What is a reasonable expectation for one week?

Tough questions and no easy answers. I’m anxious to explore them, but I at the same time I don’t want to get to the answers too soon. While I believe in being responsible and accountable to make sure that we’re doing effective ministry, I also don’t want to discount or forget that God can take our miniscule and human efforts and use them. He wastes nothing. And so before I start trying to dissect and take apart what happened last week, I want to be still and know that God is and that He works in the unseen and the unknown.

What Just Happened? January 7, 2008

We made it back home on Saturday morning.  We got into Charlotte about 10:30 and on the road back to TN by midnight.  I made it back to Bristol about 4:30 after taking Michelle home and had showered, eaten a bowl of cereal and was in bed a little after 5 a.m.  I don’t even remember my head hitting the pillow I was so tired.

After getting up at 2 p.m. on Saturday, talking to my Mom and Jennifer some, checking email, eating another bowl of cereal, I looked outside to see that it was getting dark.  What just happened to the day?

I think my general disorientation about the day mirrors my disorientation about the trip.  The week was packed full of activity, and while staying at the Hope House with the girls was an awesome experience, it didn’t leave much time to process or reflect on what happened.  While I know that some good relationships were built and seeds were planted with the kids at the centers, I think it will take me and the rest of the team to process all the stories from the trip.  I hope to share those here over the next few weeks.  You can see pictures from the trip on the left.

For now, some more prayers requests and praises:

• Praises for good health and safety while traveling, for the relationships that were formed and seeds that were planted among the children we met.
• Praises for all those who supported and prayed for us while we were gone.
• Prayers for:
  • Astrid’s family, the country coordinator for Honduras for Orphan Helpers.  Her grandfather is seriously sick with cancer.
  •  Time to process the trip before getting back into the hectic pace of our lives
  • Honest, grace-filled conversations as we continue to debrief with each other, friends and family, Orphan Helpers staff, and the Global Outreach team at church
  • The Hope House girls to be  continually encouraged in their lives and relationships with Christ
  • The staff of Orphan Helpers as the continue to fulfill their mission
  • All of the team to allow the lessons learned last week to deeply impact our lives